Awesome, Awesome Week (:

Well, life since graduation has been a party! It's been so fun! It's funny, I feel like I should feel older, but I don't feel older at all.... am I really mature enough to graduate? (: Haha, just kiddin'! Actually, I think I was very ready! Anyways, it's been so fun. I've been able to spend a ton of time with some of my most favorite people in my life. Partyin' with Allie and Amber, the crazy Madrigals, Kaitlyn, Spencer, and Chris Williams, and not having to work? Plus having lots of time with my family, including my cousin Emilie, who are some of the funniest people I've ever met (: It's been fantastic! I'm going to miss these people so much. Amber and Allie are some of my greatest examples.. I'm so grateful I've been able to get to know them better. Their incredible. If anybody has a sure ticket to heaven, it's them, haha. Anyways. It's been a blast (: I'm going to miss them. A ton. My heart aches just thinking about it... so I won't too long. I'll put up cute pictures instead (:

Supreme Captain Spencer Williams!

Daddy and I at one of our favorite joints (:

One of the funniest, most awesome people in the world!

Cute friends

At Disneyland.. more cute friends (:

At the beginning of the year! We look so little!

Amber and I's clothing experiment..

Hiking! Woot woot

At Seminary Graduation

My cute cousin and I

Percy with the perky butt.. haha

Haden the mighty warrior

Officially a student of...

The University of Mary Washington!!

WOOHOO!!!! (: 

(shrill blonde shriek and clapping of hands)

Quite honestly, it is a miracle. I didn't even consider education in Virginia an option, until after spring break. Because of this, I missed a ton of deadlines.. including the application, scholarship, and financial aid deadlines. However, I decided to try applying anyways. So I turned in my application, and what do you know? I got accepted! However, it was accepted for out of state tuition... Thanks to my Dad being in the Navy, and an utter miracle, we were able to get instate tuition. My parents offered to pay for the first semester, so that I could take advantage of financial aid and scholarships for next semester. How incredible is that?

I am so, so grateful for this opportunity. I'm not quite sure what to expect... but I suppose that's any incoming college student's experience. What will it be like? Will I make good friends? Will I be ok keeping up with intense papers and studying? It's nerve wracking! It's also on the other side of the country...

I am so, so excited to spend time with the kids and my family there though. Honestly, they are the reason I am going.. along with having the opportunity to have an education on the Eastern coast, which is rich with history and all sorts of things to do. It will be an adventure, that's for sure! I have prayed and fasted, and I feel like this is the choice that is best for me right now. I feel like this is where I need to be.. at least for now. I am not leaving Utah forever. I would be quite happy settling in Salt Lake someday, with a strong, handsome husband, lovely little children, and just traveling everywhere. Honestly, that is my dream now, haha. A cozy home with a few horses, an art studio, a baby grand piano, and lots of outdoor equipment to camp and fish and hike. But this is going to be an incredible experience, and such an amazing adventure (: I know there's tough things ahead, but I'm going to face them strongly, and try to be the best I can be! I am SO excited for this venture into the great unknown!

I am so grateful for this opportunity.. when you think of the few people in the world who even get to attend college, and who would sacrifice so much for that education. Then here I am, with this incredible opportunity. It is really humbling, and I am so grateful.

p.s. I'm also very excited to be so close to the center of our country (: D.C. is only an hour away, with the monuments, the Smithsonian, and all sorts of historical things! Also Mount Vernon and Monticello... I'm ecstatic to see those places!

Closer and closer...

Last moments for this week:
The last BYC meeting
The last doctor's appointment, on Wednesday
The last free pizza from Papa Murphy's
Finally throwing away my corsages, beautiful dried flowers, and taking down my dance pictures
The last Seminary Counsel party, with ridiculous amounts of Panda Express and candy

Whoa. I can't believe it's almost here. I am freaking out, ha. I am so, so nervous. In one month from Friday I am off to Virginia! The other side of the world! Nothing will ever, ever be the same. I'll officially be an adult.. Wow.
This week was awesome. I couldn't believe how well the Senior Night at the Seminary went (: It has been such a blessing in my life.. the teachers are incredible, and have taught me so much. They've opened my eyes to all sorts of things, and have really helped me live, not just know about, the gospel. Being on seminary counsel especially has taught me alot. Although it's been really hard or frustrating to wake up early and go to meetings, or have to clean up after everyone leaves, it has been such an incredible experience, and I wouldn't have changed a thing. It was amazing (:
Probably my favorite part was our theme, D&C 68:6. It's kind of funny, as we were choosing the theme, I was convinced another one would be better. But as we talked about it, I just felt alot of peace and finally realized that the one we chose was the best. It has been so powerful.

"Wherefore, be of good cheer, and do not fear, for I the Lord am with you, and will stand by you, and ye shall bear record of me, even Jesus Christ, that I am the Son of the living God, that I was, that I am, and that I am to come"

This scripture has grown to be so close to my heart. It gives me so much comfort in the big things to the little things, from performing a solo in solo & ensemble to choosing a college to go to. That's one of my favorite things about the gospel - the principles apply to all aspects of your life, and encompass both the smallest and the most immense things. It's great (: And so comforting. It really strengthens my faith. Life is so exciting, but very scary right now. But I know that I don't have to fear. The Lord is with me, and will stand by me, and so I will be of good cheer! I don't have to be afraid. It will all turn out ok (:

Heart Warming Reflections

Mm, time. It just seems to go flying by, faster and faster, more quickly than I can comprehend! I can't believe it's almost graduation. It's surreal. All the things that have happened this year have taught me so much.. it's been one of the funnest, most emotional, most learning-filled years of my life. But I can't believe it's almost over. I leave in one month, to the great unknown. I'm scared out of my wits. But I know that it will be ok. I just need to remember the things that my parents, my leaders, and my friends have taught me. I know that they'll always be there for me. And I know even- not if, but when- I mess up, it will be ok. That's what life's all about, right? Messing up and just never giving up, no matter how many times you fall or what obstacles you face.. living with faith, courage, and just trying to do your best. There are so, so many happy things in life (: I feel like I'm finally starting to grow into the person I want to be.
I'm going to miss my parents, so much. I don't know what I'm going to do without always having them there for advice, hilarious laughs, and a shoulder to cry on.
I'm going to miss my friends, they have been so incredible to me, and we have had so many fun times. Thanks for the incredible memories (:
I'm going to miss Madrigals. A ton. I don't know what I would have done this year without this group of kids. They've made my life so, so happy (: and have given me some of my most favorite memories, that I will cherish forever
I'm going to miss one of my best friends, Chris Williams, especially! He's such a cute kid, and one of my most favorite people on this whole vast planet we call earth. I'm going to miss playing Little Big Planet with him. I'm going to miss his hilarious sense of humor, and how he always brightens up my day!
I'm going to miss Papa Murphy's, believe it or not. Ok, don't believe it, hahaha. Probably not the mopping, or being register girl. But I will miss the amazing people I work with who make work so fun, and who I have gotten to know there. I will miss the discount as well, of course ;)
I'm going to miss my huge white van, the beast. It gives me such a power rush to drive that thing.
I'm going to miss the ward... the people here are incredible. They are such amazing examples to me, whether they know it or not. This neighborhood, and the kind people who live here have made such a huge impact on my life... it really is a little piece of heaven, nestled cozily in WJ.
I'm going to miss being able to go to the temple in the morning, whenever I want. Having it only 15 minutes away has been awesome.. I wish I had taken more advantage of it.
There's a ton I'm going to be really sad leaving behind.
But wherever I go, and whatever I do, this time will always hold a really special place in my heart. I just wish the happiest for the people I'm leaving. Their moving on with their lives, and I'm moving on with mine. But I wish them true happiness and joy, laughter and fun, and all the cheesy things in between (: And they'll never stop being my friends. They'll always have a place in my heart. Thanks guys (:
Here's some pictures from just a few out of thousands and millions and zillions of my favorite memories from high school, which just scratch the surface! What a fabulous few years they have been!

Contemplating Joy

So I've been reading this book, "Surprised by Joy" by C. S. Lewis. It is INCREDIBLE. I thoroughly, absolutely recommend it to anyone and everyone. It's basically about the shape of his early life, how he grew into the man he became concerning his religious beliefs. Anyways. It's fabulous. But I've been thinking a lot lately about joy, and what brings it... and he put it so eloquently, I decided to post it on my blog, slightly edited so it makes sense - I just took out what you have to read the book to understand, things that reference to his previous stories.

"It is difficult to find words strong enough for the sensation which came over me. It was a sensation, of course, of desire; but desire for what? Before I knew what I desired, the desire itself was gone, the whole glimpse withdrawn, the world turned commonplace again, or only stirred by a longing for the longing that had just ceased. It had taken only a moment of time; and in a certain sense everything else that had ever happened to me was insignificant in comparison.
It was an unsatisfied desire which is itself more desirable than any other satisfaction. I call it Joy, which is here a technical term and must be sharply distinguished from both Happiness and from Pleasure. Joy (in my sense) has indeed one characteristic, and one only, in common with them; the fact that anyone who has experienced it will want it again. Apart from that, and considered it's only quality, it might almost equally well be called a particular kind of unhappiness or grief. But then it is a kind we want. I doubt whether anyone who has tasted it would ever, if both were in his power, exchange it for all the pleasures in the world. But then Joy is never in our power and pleasure often is."

Now, when I read this it just hit me so hard. I feel like he defined exactly what I have been struggling to put a finger on. Because joy is different - it's not in our power to create, it's not something we can force or concoct out of thin air. It's interesting in life how some things that may seem so glamorous and exciting turn out to be so disappointing and empty, when in contrast small, seemingly insignificant things bring so much happiness. I've found in my life that this joy comes from serving others, and serving God. It comes through having relationships and friendship, and in getting to know and building yourself. It comes from doing what is right, even when it's really hard. It comes from being true to yourself, and being honest (: When you have experienced joy there is nothing like it. It satisfies the soul. I think sometimes people find what they think is joy, when it really is just pleasure. There's no glorious meaning... it's empty.

Anyways, these are my deep thoughts for the week. I'm ecstatic to finish this book, and to learn more about it. This week has been awesome. As my thoughts turn ever more to the future, I always wonder to myself if I'll be able to find and keep that joy constantly in my life. I think I will. I know if I continuously do what I know to be right, things will always work out. I'll be able to keep and receive more of that joy, that fulfillment and satisfaction in my life. I am so, so grateful for good friends. They make a huge difference. I have so many incredible people in my life. I am very, very blessed. I'm going to miss Utah. But I am convinced that very, very happy things are coming in the future (:

What you see and hear depends a great deal on where you are standing; it also depends on what sort of person you are
C.S. Lewis